Da Hata Report

According to sources Jenny from the Block aka J.Lo aka Jennifer Lopez was released or given the boot from her label Epic Records. While the reasons for this sudden change in her signage status are still unclear, one things for sure… her latest two singles completely BOMBED!! If you’re scratching your head and asking yourself what two songs… my response to you is EXACTLY!!

Jennifer debuted “Louboutins” at the American Music Awards back in 2009. While I don’t really remember the song, I do remember her performance. Partially because she was using a boxing-theme, but more so because she also busted her ass during one of the dance routines. Those of us on the East Coast actually watched it live but by the time it made it to the West Coast the network had already cut it out.

PRESS PLAY TO WATCH VIDEO: “Fresh Out the Oven”

Now I told you people months ago that this song “Fresh Out of the Oven” was WACK and I was right. This was a major mistake for J.Lo and it’s to late now to say I told you so… BUT… I told you so. Not even Pitbull could have changed the fatal outcome of this dumb ass song. What the hell is “Fresh Out the Oven”? Can somebody please tell me? Sometimes people get lucky with songs that are straight bullshit like the GS Boyz with “Stanky Leg” or D4L with “Laffy Taffy”, but J.Lo is considered to be a “seasoned veteran”. Didn’t Puffy teach her anything? Come on son… did she really think this “Fresh Out the Oven” shit was going to fly? YES Men will set you up to fail each and every time!

Man it must suck when you’re considered to be a major recording artist and you still get the boot from your label. This just goes to prove that no matter how big you may think you are… things never stay the same. One minute your hot and the next minute some young thing comes along and steals your shine.

Well the good news is that she’s filthy rich from all her other business endeavors such as her clothing and accessories line, multiple fragrances, and most importantly royalties. She’s not washed up yet. Jennifer’s still got her acting career to fall back on and to be honest that’s were most of her notoriety is coming from these days anyway. Her new film “The Back-Up Plan” hits theaters this Spring, and I’m sure it will be just like every other cheesy romantic comedy that she’s ever done. Jennifer is a so-so actress and a so-so singer. She better hope to God or whoever it is that she believes in that her looks never fade!

In the meantime you can forget about ever hearing anything else off her upcoming “Love” album because that projects been dropped like a diseased hot potato.

~Dana Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan™

Also Follow Dana on Twitter @DesignatedHata

www.dadesignatedhata.com

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So I just felt like having fun and bringing it back to when a song just mad people act stupid in a good way. In 1990 rap group 3rd Bass coined the phrase “The Gas Face” and it was a huge hit. The beat was dope, the rhymes were cool, and the gas face gimmick totally worked because for some strange reason people seem to love it when song tells you what to do. You’d be listening to the radio, standing on the block, or up in the club and the next thing you know everyone would just bust out with their version of the “Gas Face”.

PRESS PLAY TO WATCH VIDEO

….You Get’s The GAS FACE… While you can’t see me right now, just know that I’m giving it to you…LMAO.

~Dana Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan™

Also Follow Dana on Twitter @DesignatedHata

www.dadesignatedhata.com

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You have to be living under a rock if you haven’t heard of Justin Bieber. Sure he may just be a kid but he’s got a lot going for him, and unlike most kids his age he’s actually got a song and video that’s age appropriate. His latest single “Baby” features a few bars from rapper/actor Ludacris.

PRESS PLAY TO WATCH VIDEO

Yes he’s the new white kid on the block and his music appeals to both children and adults. You’ve probably heard his songs on the radio and had no idea that you were bopping your head to the music of a 15-year-old. He may be young in age but he has the soul of someone a lot older. With no formal musical training Justin took to Youtube posting videos for friends and family. This quickly exploded into something much greater and the Canadian native was eventually approached by Justin Timberlake and even Usher. He later went on to sign a deal with Island Records back in October of 2008 and the rest is history in the making for this young star.

~Dana Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan™

Also Follow Dana on Twitter @DesignatedHata

www.dadesignatedhata.com

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As if the media hasn’t been sucked into the madness that is known as Lady GaGa… today she has managed to push the envelope once again. Although her music may be entertaining, I think that her weird sense of fashion sort of trumps her musical skill sets (which she actually has). People are more concerned about what she will be wearing as opposed to what her next single will be.

We’ve seen Lady GaGa kill Kermit The Frog, watched her massacre the Phantom of the Opera, and now she’s taken that Madonna role model shit to a whole new level. To think that conservative prudes everywhere were pissing mad when they had to deal with the Vogue lingerie movement of pine cone tah-tah’s. If they thought that was insulting… what in the world are they going to do now that Lady GaGa’s damn near topless and rocking a strap-on penis just for kicks?

CHECK OUT WHAT SHE’S PACKING

Although she continues to mystify me with her weirdness… people are still consumed with her fashion pranks to gain their attention. Listen up folks, she’s not breaking any new ground with her music! She’s simply making you stop and take notice be it good or bad. It’s no wonder that her album is called “Fame Monster”. She’s so hungry for everyone’s attention that she will do just about anything to get it.

In this case she’s decided to go topless and strap on a penis as a funny way at getting back at those who continue to insist that she is a man or a hermaphrodite. Yes celebrities are people too and this was her way at fighting back. We obviously know she’s not a man thanks to all the childhood videos surfing the net and her over abundant wardrobe consisting or mostly leotards…LOL. Don’t front. You know she likes prancing around in them on and off stage. Sure she could be tucking… but she’s a girl damn-it! People are gonna talk no matter what, and “Q” magazine decided to advantage of the factor for their February 2010 issue.

Unlike an uptight America, the British are not afraid to embrace the human body in all its forms. Kudos to Q for one up’ing American media. I’m sure they’re somewhere going DAMN why didn’t we think of that…SMH. Lady GaGa told the magazine, “We all know that one of the biggest talking points of the year was that I have a dick, so why not give them what they want? I want to wear a dick strapped to my vagina.” Yeah, I know… not exactly what you were expecting to hear but that’s your GaGa.

This was a very BOLD move for a straight woman but she’s certainly packing…LOL. I’m sure the gay community must be singing her praises right about now. Especially since Lady GaGa is the next best thing to run up into the world of costume since Cher. She’s a Drag Queen’s dream and a designers new BFF. While the rumors about Lady GaGa’s genitalia may never actually dissipate, one things for sure, GaGa ain’t going nowhere and you can best believe that the controversy will continue to follow. In the meantime sit back, relax, and enjoy the show.

~Dana Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan™

Also Follow Dana on Twitter @DesignatedHata

www.dadesignatedhata.com

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Talk about a trooper… Kardinal Offishall is back for yet another round with the music industry. I don’t know… maybe it’s just me but it seems as though no matter how hard this boy tries, his career always gets the short end of the stick. Could it be because it’s Canadian Hip-Hop with a twist of Reggae? Kardinal is obviously talented, otherwise no one would fuck with him. BUT something still seems to be missing even though he’s finally got those major record label dollars backing him. Which in itself is a huge triumph because usually West Indian artists don’t get the same love as other genres when being pushed to mainstream commercial Hip-Hop’ers.

Kardinal signed to Akon’s label Konvict Muzik back in 2007, and I could’ve sworn that that was what he needed to make an even bigger impact considering who he was working with. Especially since his single “Dangerous” off of the “Not 4 Sale” album had been tearing up the Billboard charts. Not to mention that his videos have the same finished appeal as Sean Paul, Wyclef, or Shaggy… yet he’s still struggling to for a place to call his own in this fickle industry.

Well you can’t keep a West Indian down… Kardinal Offishall is back again and ready for another round with his latest release “We Gon Go”.

PRESS PLAY TO WATCH VIDEO

The video is actually really good…but the real question is will this song make any noise? Are the 106 & Parker’s going to support him or will it be left to the underground old school heads to show this man some respect? Only time will tell. In the meantime pass me some bun and cheese and let’s see what happens.

~Dana Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan™

Also Follow Dana on Twitter @DesignatedHata

www.dadesignatedhata.com

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Ever since Rhianna broke her silence following the Chris Breezy beat down/break up, she’s been dressing either too damn provocative or digging shit out of Lady GaGa’s hell-nah closet. Can somebody please tell me what the fuck does she have on? and Who told her that she shouldn’t comb her Grace Jones hair?

Where the hell is PETA when you need them? I’m sure this zebra is feeling really exposed right about now…LMAO. Hopefully it’s just a wooden pony but the whole thing is really strange if you ask me, but celebrities are known to do shit that makes even backyard bumpkin go hmmm.

Anyway RiRi’s back once again with another song off her really bad album, “Russian Roulette” called “Rude Boy”.

PRESS PLAY TO WATCH VIDEO

Once again, Rhianna has lost the good fight. This video is super wack and I’m still questioning why it was released? Can somebody please get all Shelly Thunder on her ass because “sometimes a man fi get kuff, fi get kuff, fi get kuff” or in this case Rhianna needs “to get cuff”!!

I’m just speaking the truth.

~Dana Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan™

Also Follow Dana on Twitter @DesignatedHata

www.dadesignatedhata.com

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So Drake did a commercial for Sprite in a continued attempt to prove to the world that he’s the “new best”…

Could you image that if drinking Sprite really did this to you? I for one would seriously be getting my “Men In Black” on…LOL. This commercial is cool because the CGI is dope, but it doesn’t make me want to buy or drink Sprite over any other fizzy drink that’s on the market. Shout out to Drake for picking up another check!

~Dana Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan™

Also Follow Dana on Twitter @DesignatedHata

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It’s that time of the week when I go digging through the crates and start pulling out songs that you haven’t heard in a while. So press play and enjoy.

~Dana Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan™

Also Follow Dana on Twitter @DesignatedHata

www.dadesignatedhata.com

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Judging from reports, the dating pool nowadays is shallow. Trying to find someone to mix and mingle with is almost as difficult as finding the perfect pair of shoes to wear. There are so many things to take into consideration: looks, smarts, finances, sexual partners, amongst other things. I listed them in no particular order but I mean, which of those things are most important to you?

Along with asking people their name, age and sexual preference, you have to also ask another important question, “What’s your sex number?” A “sex number”? What’s that you ask? A sex number is the number of sexual partners you’ve had in a lifetime. Now I gotta tell you folks, this question could make or break the next person you meet.

A sex number is important. Given the disease rate out here, it is important that you know a partner’s history. To check your perspective partners lifestyle, a sex number is almost as important as a credit score. You know that if a partner has had more partners than their chronological age, they are not settle down material. Chances are they want to settle down but the tendency to continue their sex rampage is alive and well. Most women don’t want to marry a peen that has been inside of scores of women… Right? I’ve seen pictures of dirty, infected peens and it is not pretty. Imagine the embarrassment of walking down the street with your partner and at least 5 of the people you walk by, they’ve slept with. And fellas, would you be willing to wife the woman that has had more than 40 sex partners? Honestly? Men want to have relations with women everywhere but their wife has to be untouched. And it’s the fellas who have high sex numbers that expect to wife someone who hasn’t slept with a lot of people. Didn’t you run through a few communities? And who’s to say that these were all protected experiences. Given the fact that some diseases take time to manifest, you could be sleeping with a diseased person and not even know it. People don’t “look” diseased or clean. They need to be tested.

So what happens when someone is asked “How many..?” and it is too many? Well, according to the American Census Bureau, the average sex partners for women is 3, and the average for men is 5. Really?? Somebody is lying!! And that actually is how people get around discussing their promiscuity. The solution for some of the people I spoke to, a lot of them lie. Not the men so much but the women… Lie through their teeth. Do women lie because men can’t handle the truth? Could a man be comfortable knowing that his partner slept with many men? Are women okay with the idea that their perspective partner had many women? Could that be considered judging a person based on their past? I mean of they were single and wanted to walk around screwing everything that moved, does that make them a bad person? Or just a nasty person? There was one young lady who was 18 years old and said she had roughly 20 sexual partners, but she lies and says 15… 15? Somebody needs to talk to her and tell her that 15 at 18 is too gotdamn many.

Photo Credit: Ben Welsh/zefa/Corbis

I mean is it really necessary to lie? Does it depend on how you feel about the person you are meeting? And if you do lie, do you rectify the situation after you’ve been with the person for awhile? What happens if you lie but forget the umber you used in the lie? All these are things that I wondered about while I listened to some of these people talk about lying about their number of sex partners. I would want to know the truth. But that’s just me. Let me decide if I think that number is too many. And in worse case scenarios, don’t even ask. You could be in love with someone and then when you find out how many people they slept with, your whole image of them is out the window. Honesty is still the best policy. Relationships can’t be built on lies, even ones about sex partners. If you could lie about that, you could lie about anything. When and if I was ever asked, I always told the truth. I’m proud of my number. If you ask someone and the number is not to your liking then you could get to steppin’… Move along. Word.

~Ms. Sui Generis
“Others do what they can while I do what I want…”

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When news of the 7.0 earthquake that hit Haiti began to spread across the world of Hip-Hop, Rap, and R&B, on Monday, January 11, 2010… fans immediately began to turn to Wyclef Jean’s Foundation which is now known as the Yele Haiti Foundation to make sense of this devastating situation.

Wyclef’s foundation was established way before this disaster struck, and his fans know just how hard he has continued to work to support the efforts of his non-profit. However, some have begun to scrutinize his organization and his commitment to the Yele Haiti Foundation. In personal message to his followers, Wyclef addresses the nay sayers and skeptics that question his dedication to Haiti now more than ever.

PRESS PLAY TO LISTEN TO WYCLEF’S COMMENTS

As a side note to all you folks that decided to donated money… the TEXT donations that are raising money for YELE and The Red Cross are a wonderful way to give easily. However, it takes weeks to process these donations and the organizations don’t get that money so quickly. If you can take 5 extra minutes to visit their websites (www.yele.org AND/OR www.redcross.org) and a make a donation that way, the organizations will get the money right away like you intended.

~Dana Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan™

Also Follow Dana on Twitter @DesignatedHata

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